A second good thing!

My Jaron had his first day at a new school today! Mama cried this morning! But my worried little guy was tenderly reminded that he may feel nervous at first but I have seen before that by the end of the day, he will have at least two new friends. Well, everyone was so wonderful to both of us. And Jaron was quickly escorted off to his grade two Montessori class. And a sub. Oh dear!! Then I picked him up at the end of the day and heard a chorus of goodbyes to Jaron along with plans to exchange phone numbers. And he listed off three kids names and two other kids that he had gotten to know by the end of his first afternoon! So, once again, my little social magnet has managed to have a GREAT day!! And all of his nerves dissolved into a giant smile!

Tomorrow we tackle - the new bus!!

One good thing!

I've got a plan. All this 'stuff' that I'm going through coming to a head at the age of 32, with my future bright before me - once I get through all this. And I've been tormenting over not having a plan. All these decisions to make and all this 'stuff' running through my mind and not really having the sound ability to make these decisions. (I think I am not actually forming ANY sentences whatsoever - but bear with me). So I may have just needed one person to add a little decisiveness to my day. Even if it is little more than a bit of hope and staying status quo and taking it day by day. I feel, like I actually have a PLAN. This is one good thing!

It's been awhile........Yes it has!

I suppose I've been at a loss for words. I thought i was doing so well, and then my mood and maybe even my life took a dive. I didn't realize i was that unstable. But i was. I'm going through one of the roughest patches of my life. But the good things coming from it are that I think I'll finally get the help I need and people are listening. They are hearing me, and they see, that I need help. I'm having a hard time sleeping. I have this wonderful thermal blanket, that is so so cozy and my son's baby blanket - yes his fleece crib blanket - and I cuddle up in those each night. I feel so many things, and comfort is hard to find. So I do this, and the last two nights I have repeated over and over - a comforting truth about God! Two nights ago it was "I am God's child.". Last night it was from a song I listened to right before I went to sleep - or tried to. It was 'Forgiven and Loved'. And each time I awoke last night - which was many many times - I fell right back to sleep, wrapped in my cozy cozy blankets and repeating "Forgiven and Loved". So this morning, I do feel comforted. If not baffled, confused and trying to let God guide (maybe futile and impatient) into the decisions I have to make for this next part of my life. I suppose the only thing clear to me is the part where I start to heal - I know that. God has given me some counsellors that I think will 'get it' and actually be helpful for me. I see one, Ruth, today. Thank God for her! And may I remember today to Praise Him when I am feeling low. And other times - but especially then. And, I'm off to work!

Nicole.